Will, Pat, and Sam walk into a bar...

"....I set an implosion device that destroyed the freighter Bok'Nor."

William Patrick Samuels causes a mind implosion inside my skull.

After developing several ideas and receiving input from my fellow Maquis-lover, Chris Donati (Swisherfan), I decided to begin the Maquis Bastion blog with the worst Maquis personnel: William Patrick Samuels, Maquis Saboteur.  Sound judgment might indicate that the first blog should be strategy-based or even contain thrilling insights into how to construct a tournament winning Maquis deck, I simply cannot get over what a terrible Maquis personnel WPS is.  There is not a reasonable strategy involving WPS nor a current insight into utilizing him in a tournament-winning deck.  He is more likely to sabotage your deck than your opponent's deck.  Every affiliation in the Star Trek Customizable Card Game - Second Edition (2E) has a few terrible cards but I feel WPS is exceptionally awful.

At the time WPS was introduced to the game, from the Energize expansion (Set 2, card 2U132), the Maquis were a sub-Federation affiliation set that could be played via their own Headquarters (Athos IV).  This amounted to a third Federation affiliation icon (prior to the introduction of The Original Series icon) and a fun storytelling dynamic in the 2E game.  As one of the 15 Maquis-icon personnel introduced in the Energize set one might imagine that a personnel with as illustrious name as "William Patrick Samuels" would be fantastic.  William T. Riker this card is not.  Not even James T. Kirk had his middle name expanded!  Card titles are misleading.  Even a casual glance at WPS makes me gag.  You know that after-taste you sometimes get when you burp a little Italian or Mexican food back up your throat?  That is what WPS does to me.  Let me break down why.

WPS requires four counters to play.  FOUR?!  This is a huge sticking point for me especially with regard to how precious play counters are in a time-sensitive tournament.  If you are going to burn four counters on a single card it better be worth it.  WPS is not worth it.

WPS has a generic staffing icon and average attributes (4/6/5), none of which justify a counter cost of four.  Skills?  At the time, *Astrometrics, *Engineer, and *Treachery might seem reasonable, given the popularity of some dilemmas in the early sets.  However, as the game progressed all three skills are readily abundant among Maquis personnel and supporting Non-Aligned choices.  So did WPS's skills fill a Maquis skill gap?  At the time of Energize, certainly, yet a four counter cost for three skills is still steep.  Therefore, his game text must bridge the seeming chasm of irrational cost-to-functionality in WPS, right?

Wrong.  During your Order phase, WPS must be on a planet mission, where your opponent has an undamaged ship, and he can then be stopped to place a Damage card (from your hand, and therefore not a Dilemma card) on that ship.  During the release of Energize battle and interactive decks were still a rare sight during sanctioned tournaments when mission solvers typically ruled the day in the early game meta.  When I first encountered WPS, I thought "Wow, now I have a shot at blowing up ships!"  This idea seemed reasonable given the introduction of Amaros and the general cheap staffing requirements of Maquis ships in Energize. 

However, this strategy is uninspiring given that a) at their planet missions, an opponent's ship likely has few to no personnel aboard because they are grouped as an away team on the mission, and b) Maquis were still far too weak compared to other affiliations in a competitive tournament environment.  In essence, WPS was introduced when 2E game designers were still tinkering with direction Maquis could go.  What would the future of Maquis look like?  Scoring cheap points and mission solving were still weak due to Maquis personnel having significant skill gaps, almost below-average mean attributes, and no defensive or offensive game utilities they now possess multiple sets later.

So here we are in the "later" era of the Maquis.  Guess what?  WPS's game text is still vomit-worthy.  I have tried countless times to incorporate WPS into a deck and frankly he falls flat.  WPS nearly falls into a reactionary category, yet barely qualifies in the offensive category of deck strategy.  Does WPS have anything going for him?  Not really.  His card image is awful.  The only thing more tragic than his hair is his clothing.  The Deep Space 9 promenade lighting reflecting off his balding scalp is embarrassing.  The digitally enhanced Sark looks better.  Thanks to his backward compatibility, I have accepted that WPS was the design team's horrible prank played not only on 2E players, but 1E players as well.

Organized Terrorist Activities is the only justification for William Patrick Samuels appearing in any edition of STCCG.